I must have cried for three hours the day my boyfriend dropped me off at my Disney apartment. I entered my room to find out that both of my roommates barely spoke English and I was such a crying mess that they could not even understand me. The rest of the apartment had been living there for over a month and were good friends. I was still in the United States but I felt so out of place. It occurred to me that I had such little experience with other cultures and types of people. I never hung out with people who were not Christians outside of school and I have lived in the same town since I was eleven years old. As my first week went on, I began trying to make sense of everything and talk to my roommates. I would talk so fast though and use phrases they were unfamiliar with, so our conversations did not get far. About two weeks into my semester away, my roommate Morgan came out of the room across the hall and took me for a walk. She told me all about her twenty – four -hour flight from New Zealand and how scared she was to be out of her country for the first time. Even though we came from two opposite sides of the world, she understood where I was coming from. After this day, I began to settle into my Disney life and I had an experience that I would not trade for anything. My best friend now lives across the world and I learned that we are not so different after all.
The way a person talks to their parents is not the same as they would talk to their significant other. This is just a plain example, but it becomes clear that people act in various ways in different groups. Judith Martin mentions in her book that “because we belong to various groups, we develop multiple identities that come into play at different times, depending on the context.” In Japanese culture, many people say mushi mushi as they answer the phone. However, if it is ever said in a context other than a phone conversation, it is considered extremely rude and people will give weird stares when they hear it. It was a phrase designed for one specific context and is only meant to be used in that context. Other words and phrases can change depending on its context. If I say I hope you die to my significant other and people do not know we are playing a video game, it would be quite confusing. This is where communication can get sticky. If a person is dealing with different cultures and people groups, then context becomes more important. In today’s American generation, I could say it is just a video game and most people would laugh along with me. However, if I went to a place where video games were not popular, it would be a lot harder to explain myself.
What a person identifies as if often a great way to get to know them. The issue is that we all have so many identities that it depends on which one is being used at what time. I identify as a fan of classic rock music, but if I am going to a job interview, it would not be the identity that I go to first. I would likely discuss how I identify myself as a hard worker and reliable employee. When dealing with Identity we also have to deal with the repercussions that is associated with that identity. No, I do not live on Starbucks and I have never owned a pair of Uggs in my life. Now, sometimes they can be light-hearted and funny like a pair of Uggs but other times they can become much more dangerous. 9/11 is a perfect example of how a few radicals with a turban caused trouble for an entire population of people. I was diagnosed with autism as a child and when people hear that, they automatically assume I am going to be unable to speak or make sense of daily life. I am a college student with a full -time job and a 3.5 GPA. Yes, I have to do certain things in a different way to make them work for me, but I am a fully functioning adult. Many times, we take something and generalize it so much to try and make sense of it, that it is not realized how problematic it can be.
Where does this leave me? There are so many ways in which I can identify myself and going to Disney made that clear to me. Everyone is so vastly different yet the same. We were all trying to adjust with being away from home and starting a new adventure, some from across the county and others across the globe. If people took a chance to get to know others, it can be seen that the world is more connected than people think. With advances in technology, we have apps that will let people communicate no matter where they go. About a month into my college program, my roommate Yuna approached me and said let’s go out to lunch. I began googling what sort of food she was used to in Japan until she began to giggle at my phone and asked if we could just go get a cheeseburger. We found out that we both hated pickles on our cheeseburger and stayed bonded for the rest of the semester. If everyone took a little time to look outside of themselves and see how they fit into a broader context, we might all become closer and more understanding.
Katie's communication blog 